The New NFL

ESPN reported (ESPN Report) today that Florida governor, Jeb Bush had been approached privately about taking over for retiring NFL commish Paul Tagliabue. This sent my wheels to spining on what the NFL would be like if this actually happened. Here’s a little look into the crystal ball, my friends.

If Jeb Bush was the NFL Commissioner:

  • Players would get vouchers so they could go to any team they wanted to at any point during the season, and their salary would continue to be paid for by the team they leave.
  • Every team would only be allowed one head coach because a 1 to 53 ratio of coach to players is ideal.
  • The pre-, regular, and post-season would be played as normal. However, all 32 NFL teams would be ranked according to their performance during the pre-, regular, and post-season (much like the NFL draft, but in reverse) with the winner of the actual Super Bowl game at #1. Then all teams would have to take a standardized test. The first team in the ranking with all team members present and passing the test, would be deemed the actual Super Bowl Champions. If the winner of the actual Super Bowl game is not deemed the Super Bowl Champion, they would be given a certificate of completion.
  • All teams would be graded on how well they improved from the previous season, and revenue from the NFL would go to the teams improving the most. Therefore, if the same team who won the championship the previous year, wins again, then that team gets no revenue from the league.
  • The NFL draft order would be determined by ranking the teams on their improvement with most improved being ranked #1.
  • Revenue to buy new equipment, uniforms or improve practice facilities and stadiums would be based on team improvement as well. Therefore, some teams could not afford to buy new equipment or uniforms or make improvements to their facilities or stadiums, but will be required to perform as well as or better than the teams who do receive revenue to make said improvements if they expect to receive any revenue the following year.
  • Teams who are not deemed the Super Bowl Champions after five years will be closed, thus possibly eliminating the entire NFL in ten years.
  • Los Angeles would not get an NFL team. The next expansion team would be located in Miami (making that 2 teams for Miami) because Jeb’s wife, Columba would want it that way. Additionally, the official language of the NFL will be Spanish.

Potential good that could come from this: Coach and player salaries would be drastically reduced to well below what they are worth with no possible chance of a substantial raise in the future.

Paul Taglibue is looking better every day.


About Leann

Lazy Pancreas Owner. TV/Movie/Theatre Junkie. Sports Fanatic. Peyton Manning Expert. Alabama Graduate. Car Karaoke Performer. Believer In Love. Come along for the ride.

Posted on May 2006, in Uncategorized and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. He is the governor of my home state, but I hate what he has done to the education system…they claim that it will reward the teachers who are working hard, blah, blah, blah, but what it is really doing is tying salary increases to student performance on a test, which is a BAD IDEA!!! So glad I am not teaching in Florida. It will be interesting to see how this affects my mom.

  2. That’s too funny!

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